turkey pot pie

Alternate title: "And this is why we don't stand on counters... Or, how I got whiplash making a photo of food."

Imagine, if you will, the perfect piece of homemade turkey pot pie. It's on the plate, you've artfully arranged the fork, it's being conveyed over to the window where the perfect light is streaming in; you must photograph it. In order to get the right angle, you have to haul your 5' 6" 110 pound carcass up onto the top of the cabinet; something you have forbidden your onlooking 8 year old to ever do on penalty of death. At the moment he blurts out "be careful up there," you begin to sway perilously backwards, grabbing a handful of useless curtain that you yank completely off of the wall on your way to your inevitably painful landing in the floor. The 8 year old looks stunned, and actually says, "wow," right out loud while he gapes at the spectacular swan dive you've just taken in your kitchen in the name of photography. And what is left for you to do in order to salvage your ego and still remain in control? You pick yourself up, brush yourself off, mumble "and this is why we don't stand on the counters," as you limp off to go eat your [humble] pie.